I was born as a wonderful child. I had a happy life but, one day I figured out I had asthma. I was timid about my illness. Now
I'm 5, I thought that having asthma isn't that defective! As the sun came out, I
felt like I couldn't breathe. A few minute later, I knew it was an asthma attack.  I didn't know what to do. I never had an asthma attack anteriorly! Also it was my birthday! I decided not to tell my mom. An hour pass, and I died! I never knew that this was going to transpire.


Picture
Photo Credit: moriza via Compfight cc

Do you think it was a good idea to hide that the author had an asthma attack?

What would had happen if the author told his/her mother?

If you had an asthma attack what would you do? Why?

 


Fiona (Team 100WC)
04/06/2013 06:28

Juliana, you obviously enjoy using extended vocabulary in your writing! I hope anyone that reads this will take a lesson from it and tell someone if they feeling ill- especially something serious like this. There's a real lesson in your writing here, well done.

Reply
Stacey (100wc)
04/06/2013 12:59

This is a really interesting take on the written prompt Juliana and what a sad ending! I like how you have used time connectives to make your 100 words flow and your attempt at using some interesting vocabulary.

I enjoyed reading through your questions too, which made me think harder about your story. In response, I think that it was certainly not a good idea not to tell anybody that they could not breathe. How could you have changed your 100 words so that the child still lived?

Reply
Juliana
05/06/2013 06:31

Dear Stacey,

I wanted to teach the reader lesson if someone has an really serious sickness, then they'll have to tell an adult. I will try to change my story by not including that the character didn't tell the mom so then it won't cause the character to die. I'm just so happy you commented on my blog!

Thanks for reading my 100 word challenge!

From,
Juliana

Reply
Juliana
05/06/2013 06:32

Dear Fiona,

Thanks for commenting on my blog! I really appreciate it! I'm so happy you enjoyed reading my blog post!


From,
Juliana

Reply

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

  My avatar:
    Smiley
Picture

Author

Hello readers, my name is Juliana. I love playing mincraft and playing the piano.

catergories

All
100 Word Challenge
Expository Writing
Favorite
Field Trip
Forest
Game
Guess
Holidays
Miscellaneous
Mr. Gobble
Narrative Writing
Opinion Writing
Secret
Ten Things

Blog Roll
Samantha
Jack H
Jospeh
Em
Maggie S
Amrita
Bella
Isaiah
Briana
Victoria
My Teacher's Blog:
Mrs. Vilas 

My Classmates' Blogs:
Alex 
Angelika
Aniysah
Antonio
Asha
Cayla
Danny
Davie
Dayanara
Dorian
Eileen
Elijah
Erica
Ghislane
Isabelle
Janiece
Kevin
Kiara
Lawrence
Saddat
Shinae
Xavier

Free website hit counter



Create a Lava Lamp

Archives

January 2014
June 2013
May 2013
April 2013
March 2013